Human vocabulary is very interesting to dissect. There are words that can build up and words that can tear down. Words and phrases that can motivate, and some that sit stagnant in our language from overuse.
One common fitness phrase that influencers, trainers and motivational speakers use to boost the energy and drive of those around them is “Show up for yourself every day!”
I’m here to tell you, I have SUCH a love-hate relationship with this phrase, and as a mom, here’s why.
While I love the reminder to show up for yourself, that is not always the easiest thing to do when you have little or big humans who are depending on you for so much.
Weekly it seems, things happen that are out of our control, and as moms it is our responsibility to take care of them. For example, if your kid gets a stomach bug, it might be hard to “show up for yourself” that day. If a friend has an emergency and needs you right away, it’s hard to “show up for yourself” while being supportive. If your husband had a last minute schedule change at work and it shifted your home schedule, it’s hard to “show up for yourself”.
These are a few examples, but there are many external factors that can play against you and cause you to not show up for yourself every day in the gym or in the kitchen.
The real downer about this is it can oftentimes make us feel like we’re failing because we didn’t “show up for ourselves every day” like we were supposed to [according to society and social media and other external influences]. The reality is, there are a few ways that we CAN show up for ourselves even if we have to cancel our appointment with the gym or have to push making homemade spaghetti sauce to another day.
Before I give you those small ways to make yourself feel more confident and strong, let me tell you the I love aspect of this phrase for myself.
Should you attempt to show up for yourself every day? Absolutely!
You can’t pour from an empty cup and I love that this phrase reminds you that you CAN prioritize yourself as a mom and as a wife. You don’t have to literally put everybody and everything in front of yourself, your body, your health, your mental space, and your emotional space. You can prioritize taking care of yourself.
But at the same time, on the days when you can’t or don’t show up for yourself, you should never feel like you’re not doing enough. You should never say to yourself, “Well what’s the point in even trying tomorrow? I failed today and the other day and I just have to keep starting over!”
That happens to so many of us mamas. The difference between success and true failure is if you let this mental block kick you and tear you down for a long time, or if you choose to pick yourself up the next day and keep going. Because let me tell you, it’s okay if you don’t show up for yourself every single day.
But it’s also okay if you DO show up for yourself. If you tell your kids things like, “You’re going to have to give me an hour and a half out of my day so that I can work out.” “I need help in the kitchen and bonus, we get to spend time together!” You even have permission to say to your husband, “Mentally I’m not okay right now. I need to do something for myself.”
Nevertheless, as moms and wives, it’s also okay (and totally normal in stages of life) to put all of that aside and be the strong, brave, fierce woman that you are and show up for your family. To be the rock. To be the emotional steady. Because for most of us, that’s also our role. And that’s why I have such a love-hate relationship with the phrase “Show up for yourself every day”, because sometimes, as moms, we just can’t. But oftentimes, we need too.
Here are 5 ways that you can show up for yourself every day whether or not you have to cancel your workout, meal prepping or other steps towards your bigger health goals.
You can spend time with the Lord
I follow Hannah Crews on Instagram and I once on her page that she reads devotionals daily, plus 3 chapters from the Old Testament and 1 chapter from the New Testament daily. I’ve started doing this as well, and I love it. It makes it easy to stick to reading the Bible by having a “plan” and gives you time with the Lord.
Don’t start your day on social media or your phone
One of the worst ways you can start your day is on social media. If you need to check your phone to look at the weather or your schedule for the day, do that and put your phone back down. Don’t start scrolling. Give yourself at least an hour before you start looking at what others are doing, reading the news, etc.
I promise this practice makes your days go better, you’ll be more joyful and you can combine it with the first tip for the truly best way to start your day.
Grounding or Meditation
Taking 15 minutes out of your day to ground or meditate is incredibly beneficial to your mental and emotional space. And when you’re mentally and emotionally intune, you’re physically intune as well.
If you don’t know how to meditate or ground without guidance, there are hundreds of videos on YouTube that guide you through short meditations. (Pro tip: have your kids join you!)
Get sunshine and fresh air throughout the day
One of my favorite things to do when I’m feeling cooped up, electronically bogged down, or mentally exhausted is to step outside for a short while. It’s almost like it hits the refresh button on my brain and body when I do that.
If it’s cold outside, if it’s snowing or raining, consider sitting by a cracked window for 5 minutes and and breathe in that fresh air, that fresh snow, or that fresh rain.
Walk the dog without any electronics
Let your animal motivate you to get out of the house without any electronics. Really pay attention to the nature around you, sounds, smells and the sunshine. Maybe you’ll love it so much that you’ll want to take him or her around the block a few times a day to refresh your mental game!
These are just a few ways that you can show up for yourself. Even if it’s only for 5 minutes out of your day, don’t be afraid to do small things when you have to cancel your big appointmentes. I promise you that those small little habits, in conjunction with trying to prioritize your big health (working out + nutrition) will equal big results that you’ll see with time!
